So January was a funny one for me I started it feeling really aligned with my decision to take it easy & let my intentions flow naturally.
One of my intentions was to share my 5 Week Online Reconnect & Reset course to support people to reconnect to themselves through the practices & wisdom of yoga.
Unfortunately, that didn’t go to plan as I didn’t get as many people signing up for it as I had hoped.
To be honest as I write this I am not surprised!
However, initially my mind started to do it’s usual telling me I wasn’t good enough, that nobody wanted to work with me… you know how the self-sabotaging & imposter syndrome goes.
But instead of letting my mind take over I went under the blankets (quite literally at times) & sat in the darkness asking myself what this was really about?
Reflecting I realised that I wasn’t a vibrational match for the course as I wasn’t fully rooted in myself.
Life has been a rollercoaster over the past few years & since coming back to Scotland last September I have been living between 2 cities & different houses. Issues with transport, unreliable internet amongst other things also added to the list of reasons why it wasn’t the right time to start the course.
As well as leaving me feeling ungrounded, being all over the place & lacking the stability of my own home also triggered some old childhood wounds that needed integrated,
So, in all honesty how could I show up for anyone on a deeper level when I was needing my own attention.
Another reason was part of me wasn't showing up authentically & rather I was just going with the January hype of needing to have something to offer people.
A big part of my personal & spiritual development has been the learning of cyclical living & aligning with the energies of the seasons. Winter is the time for me to be resting, restoring, & planning for the rest of the year.
So, how could I share that which I wasn’t embodying?
But of course my ego wasn’t having any of that, but in the end as I have been slowly learning the universe always has the final say.
And so I cancelled the course.
I write this email honestly & open-heartedly in case you need the reminder that it’s ok for things not to work out as you plan, to listen to your gut & know that if it doesn’t feel right then it probably isn’t.
To be humble... to re-evaluate & make changes if you need to.
To know that there are messages to be found in everything you perceive as a negative & that everything will happen when it is meant to…organically…there’s no need to force or rush things.
And most importantly it is ok to put yourself first before others!
Having taken the time to listen & feel into my inner wisdom, I am looking forward to rescheduling the course to the Springtime as we move into a new season.
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